I Apologize


You are a Muslim-woman.  You are a loving daughter of your poor village-parents, loving doll of your brothers/sisters.  Without much formal education, you are thorough in your devotion to Allah/Prophet (SA)/Qur’aan, in your Namaz, Roja, Zakat, and other Islami rituals.  Though unsung and unlamented, you continuously work hard for your home and loving kids. Your husband is an average guy. He works hard for the family and in last 10/15 years made some properties also. You are happy, content. 

And then the thunder brakes down on your head, for no fault of yours. 

For silly reason, your husband gets upset with you and utters “Talaq” three times in a row. And he gets stunned. He did not really mean to divorce you, and realizes his blunder immediately. But the neighbours overhear his utterance and reach it to the Chairman of the Union Porishod. The Chairman feels it necessary to observe the Islamic Law. He declares that you are divorced. You will have to leave the house after the Iddat,  and  observe “hijab” to your “ex”-husband, the same person whom you gifted kids and shared bed/life with. 

The Imam does not quite agree with the finality of the divorce because the utterances were done all at one time.  He brings Maolana Wahiduddin’s  “Woman in Islamic Shariah” and shows from page 109 that according to a hadis of Abu Daud ( Sahi Sitta), the prophet (SA)  took three utterances at one time as one utterance. He also shows from page 51 of Md Sharif Chaudhry’s “Women’s Rights in Islam” that a hadis of Nisai ( Sahi Sitta) records the Prophet (SA) got extremely angry with a case like this and  said “ Are you playing with the Book of Almighty and Glorious Allah while I am ( still) amongst you”?  The same he shows again in page 127 in the Bangla translation of the Qur’aan by Maolana   Muhiuddin Khan.  (This book he bought from a bookshop by cash money though at the bottom of the 2nd page it is written that this is only for free distribution from the Saudi King, and not for sale).  But the Imam was defeated. The Chairman showed from the page 110 of the same book of Maolana Wahiduddin that latter Khalifa Omar (RA) validated the divorce with three utterances at one time, though he used to whip the husbands for this ‘crime’ against the Qur’aan. 

So, you are divorced now.  What is your fault?  You don’t know. 

They open the Qur’aan and read the divine instruction from Sura Al-Bakara

( Sura-Cow)-230:-  “So if he divorces her ( for a third time) then she shall not be lawful to  him until she weds another husband;  and if he (also) divorces her, then  there shall be no sin on either of them if they return to each other………..” ( translated by molla,- please double check for “distortion”. ) 

So now you must marry somebody else and then get divorced by him to be re-united with your home, your kids and husband! You stand like a statue of stone. Your husband stands like a statue of stone, speechless, like a helpless orphan in front an extremely powerful religious system.  There is a chance of repentance and hope of pardon from Allah for heinous crimes like killing, rape, theft or robbery.  But there is no chance for you or your husband for his simple slip of tongue.  Allah knows, he did not mean to divorce you.  The whole village stood speechless. 

You never even thought of “marrying” anybody else. You feel shocked, humiliated, finished.  But there is no room for feeling in a law.  With ocean of tears you and your husband agree to the “marriage”.  Somebody comes up. He is an honest guy.  He agrees to marry and then divorce you, plans in his mind not to touch you, to keep your physical chastity.   

But no! It was not that easy! There the Chairman opens the details of Islami Sharia. He reads it to others:-  

Rule No#2536. ………She becomes haraam for him after the third divorce. But if she marries another man after the third divorce, she becomes halal for the first husband on fulfillment of five conditions, that is, only then he can remarry her: 

  1. The marriage with the second person should have been of permanent nature. If he contracts wither a temporary marriage for one month or a year, and then separates from her, the first husband can not marry her.
  1. The second husband should have had sexual intercourse with her, and the obligatory precaution is that the sexual intercourse should have taken place in a normal way.
  1. The second husband divorces her, or dies.
  1. The waiting period  (iddah) of divorce or iddah of death of the second husband should have come to an end.
  1. On the basis of obligatory precaution the second husband should have been Baligh (means adult - fatemolla) at the time of intercourse.  (fatemolla says:-  how come a  non-Baligh, means non-adult…………Oh! Forget it!) 


Your husband in a broken voice raises the point that the Sharia Book is written by Ayatullah al Uzama Syed Ali al-Husaini Seestani, the top legal authority of 200 plus million Shias, and may not be applicable to you because you are Sunni. Poor man takes a last desperate chance to save you from taking your cloths off to another man, “legally”.  The Imam again opens the Bangla-Qur’aan and reads the Tafseer from page 126:- “ The condition of their re-marriage is, the wife will marry somebody else after the Iddat. And if for any reason the second husband divorces her after the sexual relation , or he dies, then she can re-marry the first husband after the Iddat.”  (translated by molla, please double check!).  Then somebody brings “Moksudul Momeneen” by Alhaz  Md. Lutful Alam, and reads from page 231:-  “ The foremost condition of HILA ( the second marriage) is a definite sexual intercourse with the second husband. HILA must be according to Sharia like a common marriage. There must not be any condition of divorce or anything else. There must not be a divorce from the second husband by force.  He will divorce according to his will. There is nothing to do if he does not divorce”. 

Are you listening?  Are you hearing anything, seeing anything? Are you trying to say something? You seem to be deaf, dumb and blind.  You always believed in Keyamat.  Keyamat is here, now, for you. A hundred times you have read the Qur’aan with total devotion,  4:79 “ Whatever good befalls you it is from God and whatever evil befalls you it is from yourself…..”.   So you restlessly look for your fault in heaven and earth. You do not see any. Now you have to perform the same acts in the kitchen and in the bed you did with your loving husband. You feel a knife on your throat. Your husband feels a knife on his throat. Your children are shaking like animals in front of slaughterhouse. They will never recover from the trauma they are undergoing now.  They will never be able to recover from it, be able to become complete human beings.  

THAT IS “HILA”,  ONE OF THE LAWS OF ISLAMI SHARIA, UNDISPUTED BY ALL THE SECTS.  They kill each other even in the mosques for being Shia/Sunni/Ahmadi, but all of them are quite univocal about the cruel devastating effect of some Islami rules/laws/regulations on your life. They don’t realise how precious your life is. They fail to respect your incredibly complicated systems of body and mind which nature developed through its incredible effort and craftsmanship of millions of years with utmost love and care. 

I cannot save you, dear sister! I can only scream, and that is exactly what I am doing. We want Pakistan to apologize to us for the genocide on us in 1971. In different countries conscience people apologized for the crimes their ancestors did to others before centuries. For sure one day you will stand strong against this immense suffering for no fault of yours. You will say, if any religious system tortures innocent wo/mankind, it surely is some devil in disguise of religion.  Nobody has the slightest right to molest your dignity as a human being, if you are innocent. And you know that you are innocent.  

Before that happens, today with ocean of tears I deeply apologize to you for the torture we did on you for centuries. I cannot do that on behalf of all men because I am not authorized to do so.  But a day will come when all the men of Islam will realise your pain and will sincerely apologize to you, my dear sister. 







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